Howard Dean Makes Obligatory Monthly Statement

Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean made his monthly derogatory comment Monday concerning the War in Iraq. Dean told a San Antonio radio station that the idea Americans can win the War in Iraq is "just plain wrong." He went on to relate this current United States quagmire with the Vietnam War (good one Dean, hadn't heard that one before) and said that the only way to end this struggle is to embrace a "retreat and defeat" strategy. The Daily Scoffer sat down with DNC Chairman Dean early today to discuss his recent comments.

TDS "Mr. Dean, it is nice to finally be able to speak with you. Thank you for agreeing to participate in this interview."

Dean "The pleasure is all mine, actually. Your internet publication is the finest this side of the Danube!"

TDS "Thats very kind of you considering we insult your mother privately ever morning."

Dean "What..Excuse me?"

TDS "Nevermind, lets get to the comment. So you are taking a novel approach as a Democrat and only criticizing the War as opposed to offering any viable solutions...Correct?"

Dean "Well, you see, one thing many Americans do not know is that as a card carrying member of the DNC we can only complain erroneously and not make any actual credible comments. I guess you could say it's our bag."

TDS "Fair enough. You also made a very novel connection between the War in Iraq and a past American military struggle in Vietnam. Explain."

Dean "I've been watching the news lately and noticed that all of the talking heads have failed to make the connection between this war and Vietnam. I thinks its pretty clever of me to make such a wise relation between the two."

TDS "Your mother is a very promiscuous woman. How do you feel about that?"

Dean "I'm sorry did you just say my mother was a whor.."

TDS "Mr. Dean, your mother's sexual behavior is neither here nor there...Lets continue. What about your strategy 'retreat and defeat?' Can you discuss that one?"

Dean "I think everyone would agree that after my amazing performance in the 2004 election that I am the resident expert on losing a battle. I mean, did you see my performance down the stretch? I just want to put my own personal experience to work and help resolve this problem in Iraq."

TDS "Mr. Dean, it has been a pleasure discussing this issue with you. Thank you for your time. Please give your mother our regards. That's all for now. Good Bye!"