Iranian President Writes Washington

Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad did something over the weekend that has not been done for over 27 years. He wrote a letter to Washington. The letter is being sent to President Bush via the Swiss Embassy (way to stick with the whole neutrality thing Switzerland). Although the letter has yet to reach the Oval Office, we here at The Daily Scoffer have obtained an exclusive copy of it's contents.

Greetings Busch-
How are you today? Allah finds this ole bastard well. The wives send their best. Tehran is very pretty this time of the year, right before the sand turns to glass in the melting summer's heat. You should visit soon. Don't come next week though, Russia and China are coming over to discuss their cowardice. We may or may not have enough time to insult the French. I think you should not invade us. We do not really have any nuclear capabilities yet. We have only bought The Simpsons DVD Box Set and are still trying to figure this whole nuclear thing out with the help of Homer and Mr. Burns. If you do invade us, I will be forced to bomb Israel. By the way, I love your beer. Please send many cases. I have my money on the Spurs to win it all. Hellofa Derby on Saturday. I will be making a trip to Mexico as soon as they pass that new drug law. Long live Allah. Baaaalllllahahahahblaaaaaaahaahhhhhlllll.
Your Friend,
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
PS. Please send bombs just in case we need to bomb Israel.