Hu Jintao's Encounter With Novelty Called "Truth"

Commie president of one billion, three-hundred million satisfied, disenfranchised proletariat Hu Jintao visited Washington, D.C., last week, where he soiled our nation's capital with his Stalin-looplicking presence.

During a ceremony at the White House, Hu was visibly stunned and shaken when a protester yelled something known as 'the truth' at Hu as he slunk Cominternly across the White House lawn.

Adding to Hu's ire was the fact that the speaker of the truth was a practitioner of the very same religion, Falun Gong, whose adherents Hu spent his holidays (Stalin's Loop Day, Lenin's Arse-Polishing Day, Mao's Rump-Smooching Day, Hillary Clinton Day) gleefully persecuting.

In a rare break with diplomatic protocol, Hu called the truth 'a filthy running dog of capitalism, a capitalist roader, an imperialist devil, a revisionist rightist, an anti-revolutionary, an enemy of the Party, a foreign devil, a White Russian, a Brownshirt, a Greenshirt, and a dweeb'.

The truth, however, said it preferred quietly to speak for itself, as has always been its wont.

Hu, who, like every other Chinese person, has not heard the truth since 1949, when the last of the Guomindang army commanded by Generalissimo Chiang Kai-shek fled to Taiwan, left the Land of the Free in quite a huff. And he vowed never to return.

But nobody believed him.