American Companies Rushing into Fledgling Iraq Market

American companies, emboldened by the recent successful elections in Iraq, have begun moving into the former dictatorship with hopes of inking lucrative deals with Iraqi entrepreneurial counterparts.

In one example, the Coca-Cola® Corporation, realizing the need for rapid thirst quenching and electrolyte replenishment in a country that is comprised mostly of punishing desert, announced today that it was tailoring its popular Gatorade™ brand drinks to appeal to potential customers in the Middle East.

"We're retooling the packaging and the names of some beverage products to maximize exposure in this new, unfamiliar market," said Gregg Baine, chief marketing strategist for Coca-Cola®'s Trans-Jordan region.

Some notable new additions: Mullah Melon Blast, Fatwa Fruit Explosion, Ayatollah It Was Berry Good, Allawi-Zowie Kiwi-Mocha Medley, and Zesty Cranberry Juice Jihad.

"We're totally psyched about these new products, and we hope that our Iraqi customers will be, too," added Baine. "I'm drinking a Mullah Melon Blast right now, and, boy, is it Mullah-riffic."