American Idol Down To People Who Don't Suck, Ratings Plummet

The Fox hit show American Idol has cut its field of contestants down to 24 performers who don't suck and has seen a significant slowdown in ratings as a result. This was expected, explains Idol producer Aaron Golden, "We understand that people watch the first 6 weeks of Idol because the idiots on here make them feel better about themselves. Now that we are down to the talented, attractive and generally well adjusted most of America will focus on the Jack-o trial." Coincidently there are more contestants left on American Idol than people in America who care that hockey is cancelled.