Local News Station Accidentally Reports News

Local broadcasting station KHNL accidentally included some actual news in its 5 PM news program yesterday, a slip-up which resulted in the firing of the station's general manager, Curtis Willoughby. After several fictitious weather segments, a story about some elementary school kids making paper hats, and a ten-minute-long, in-depth look at whether or not the new fish-breading bucket was worth $19.95, producers suddenly cut to anchor Don Masterson explaining the intricacies of the latest upper-level Israeli-Palestinian summit currently underway in Geneva, Switzerland.

KHNL's switchboard was immediately flooded with calls from angry viewers demanding that the station return to its regularly scheduled fare of vacuous tripe. Masterson was forced to retract his statements at the beginning of the six o'clock broadcast, after which he finger-painted a giant picture of an elephant with co-anchor Lori Sweeney for almost twenty minutes.