Indonesian Government Getting Tired of all of this 'Helping'

Indonesian Vice-President Yusuf Kalla today announced that as of March 31st of this year all foreign troops participating in relief efforts would be asked to leave Indonesia.

"We've had just about enough of all of this helping," said Kalla through an interpreter at a press conference held yesterday at the Indonesian capitol building in Jakarta. "I have made my decision; it is the will of Allah that hundreds of thousands of innocent people should needlessly suffer and die. We will not tolerate any Americans, British, Australians, or other Western Christian imperialists lending a hand in bringing supplies to families left destitute after the December 26th earthquake and tsunami. Their assistance is not welcome here."

Kalla then produced a small razor from his coat pocket and cut off his nose to spite his face.

In other news, Saudi-based television network al-Jazeerah immediately began preparing a story on the callousness of the Westerners in leaving Indonesia so soon after the disaster.