Whigs Take Hit in Election

The Whig Party sustained a heavy blow in the elections Tuesday, dropping every single race in which it had entered a candidate. The party of Zachary Taylor and William Henry Harrison issued a statement which read, "all those who value states' rights have suffered a defeat this week--but we will press on, recruiting new members who care about Tippecanoe and about the Missouri Compromise. We may be down, but we're not out."

Whig campaign headquarters, which can be reached only with a letter written on vellum with a quill pen, may take a fortnight or more to respond to The Daily Scoffer's request for an interview with party higher-ups.